If you’re hoping to have a baby soon (or another one!) or if you’re pregnant already, it’s vital that you prepare for the birth. Both you and your baby will be affected by the experiences you have while you’re in labour and giving birth, perhaps for a long time afterwards, and it’s important that you’re inspired and empowered by the experience – not traumatised and depressed. In Britain we have all kinds of choices available to us, so it’s important to make those choices wisely. Not choosing is also a choice – but not one that’s going to help much!

These are the 10 steps you’re taken through to help you prepare for the best possible birth for you and your baby – or babies, if you’re having two or three at once!

Step 1: Understand ‘healthy’  

This chapter takes you through the basics. After reading this, you’ll have a good overview of what pregnancy and birth are typically like. It’s important to have this because if you don’t know enough about the whole process, you might be surprised and frightened when all kinds of weird things start happening! If you’re well prepared, you’ll go through your pregnancy, labour and birth with a sense of awe and joy, not fear, and this in itself will be helpful. This and other chapters are peppered with birth stories and comments from all kinds of women (and men and children) – as well as various professionals – so that you can get an insight into variations on the ‘typical’ experience too.

Step 2: Consider your assumptions   

You probably have all kinds of beliefs and expectations of birth, which you haven’t really thought through. Why are more and more people having caesareans? What happens if a woman’s baby is breech later on in pregnancy – does she absolutely have to have a caesarean? And is a caesarean inevitable when women are expecting twins or triplets? What about other high and low risk cases? This chapter explores some interesting assumptions and tests their limits to start you thinking through key issues.

Step 3: Do not disturb  

If you’ve already read any books about pregnancy and birth, you’ve probably heard of the ‘cascade of interventions’ which so many women end up experiencing, through lack of preparation. This chapter is about the ‘cascade of hormones’ which takes place when things go well. And by reading about this much more positive cascade, you’ll get a much better idea of how you can make your own chances of a positive outcome that much better.

Step 4: Help your baby  

It’s easy to focus too much on yourself when you’re pregnant – if only because pregnancy is such an enormous shock to the system! This chapter’s all about the baby. You’re taken through his or her (or their!) week-by-week development, right through to Week 43 of pregnancy – if you get that far. Of course, most women go into labour after 38 or 42 weeks of pregnancy. This chapter also details things you can do to help your baby of its way and will help you to see things from your baby’s perspective, not only during your pregnancy but also during labour and birth, and afterwards. Of course, this should help you make key decisions.

Step 5: Care about care  

Most of us, hopefully, have a full programme of antenatal care. However, many of us experience difficulties during our pregnancies. This chapter will help you understand what might crop up, how you can avoid problems, and how you can deal with worries if they happen to arrive in your case. It also takes you through a key issues which you’ll need to consider if you’re serious about the idea of making things as good and as safe as possible for you and your baby.

Step 6: Think ahead  

This chapter’s a sobering look at the kinds of things that can happen when people don’t prepare. By finding out about other people’s experience you’ll be able to make yourself better prepared for various eventualities. You’ll also read about women whose preparation helped them in various ways. Finally, there’s some very basic info in this chapter about what you need to take to hospital or get ready at home, if you’re having a home birth. You’ll also be guided through the process of drawing up a birth plan, which is particularly important if you’re planning to give birth at your local hospital.

Step 7: Choose who  

Finding ‘the right’ midwife or consultant is not something pregnant women often think about. Most women assume they have no choice in the matter… but actually you do. Wherever you live (around the world), there are possiblities but if you live in Britain and have access to the NHS, you have all kinds of options. But what exactly will you be looking for? What should a birth attendant really be like. Many women help to answer this question by reporting on their own experience – and there are quite a few comments from care providers too.

Step 8: Choose where  

Most women book into their local hospital these days, but increasingly women are choosing to give birth at home. Why is this? Are these two birth places your only options? Do you know anything about midwifery-led birth centres? Have you considered having a water birth? Is there any point in using a birthing pool in labour, even if you’re not planning to give birth under water? Again, you need to find out more and think through some very important issues if you’re going to be in the right place when you give birth.

Step 9: Help your body  

At last! This chapter deals with the nuts and bolts (not literally, of course) of the physical reality of pregnancy and birth. It contains all kinds of tips for making your life easier. Also, there’s a lot of useful information on what are called ‘pregnancy scares’ – you know, those issues which arise as a result of antenatal tests which come up with ‘borderline’ results, or even worrying ones. This chapter is also full of advice on how to get your baby into position for the birth (yes, literally) and how to deal with any niggly pregnancy symptoms, like morning sickness.

Step 10: Help your mind  

The last step in this journey is to look inwards at what’s going on in your mind. Are you afraid of giving birth? Is this the second time and did you have a bad experience last time? Do you realise there may well be practical things you need to sort out, so as to help your mind prepare itself for the ‘Big Day’ – the day of your baby’s birth? This chapter ends with a quick refresher course of all the points covered in the book – just so you can remind yourself of key points and get an overview.

Finally, at the end of the book, there’s a postscript which is all about life after the birth. There are tips to help you get off to a smooth start, advice on breastfeeding (if that’s what you choose to do) and ideas on how to deal with the early days, weeks and months of motherhood. The Glossary and Index at the back of the book will help you find things quickly, while you’re pregnant and in labour.  The notes and academic references are there in case you want to double-check any sources, tucked away at the back of the book. You can ignore them and just get on with the very important process of preparing to have your baby, if you prefer!