While researching childbirth over the last twelve years I came across quite a few parents whose experience of pregnancy and birth was negative. For many, pregnancy was more of an obstacle course of tests and worries, than a time of wonder and waiting. Somehow, amongst all the antenatal appointments, risk assessment and birthing pool hire, the baby-to-be got thrown out with the as yet non-existent bath water. And many women told me how the birth they’d planned went wrong in the end. From some of the women, who were the ‘statistics’ of care gone wrong, I heard horrendous stories of pain and trauma. Many simply spoke of their feelings of disempowerment as they were ‘managed’ through the maternity system. For others it was just the breastfeeding or the bonding which didn’t work out…

What was it, I wondered, that made things go wrong? Listening carefully to countless women I started making connections between behaviour in pregnancy and birth and outcomes. I realised that things often start going wrong in pregnancy for no good reason, other than fear. I also discovered—through women’s personal accounts—that pain relief often ended up causing more pain than it ever relieved, if postnatal pain was counted too.

While I was realising these things, I also became increasingly aware that very few women see the chain of events which they set up for themselves by accepting or even requesting certain treatment while they’re pregnant, in labour, giving birth and even afterwards. For example, how many women would choose to have pethidine or diamorphine while they’re giving birth if they knew it would dramatically decrease their chances of breastfeeding successfully? (And how many even know that ’diamorphine’ is just another name for ’heroin’?) Amongst the women who couldn’t care less about breastfeeding, how many of them would use pethidine or diamorphine if they knew it might increase the chances of their child becoming a drug addict in adulthood? How many have found out about and thought through the potentially harmful effects of an epidural, or gas and air?

Most importantly, I wonder how many women know that a great deal of antenatal and in-labour care flies in the face of research recommendations...

A book – or two, or three, or four – was definitely needed. I would have to describe the principles I’d deduced—the ways of making things work out. Through the research I did in order to put my ideas together I discovered that other women have discovered these principles too. And they’ve discovered how much better things can be. You can too.